If “Relaxing” Makes You Agitated…

If “Relaxing” Makes You Agitated…

For some people, trying to relax ends up feeling like anything BUT relaxing.  Calming down, or “relaxing”, might actually feel quite agitating – and your body may actually start to rev up instead of become calmer.

If this describes you, then this video is for you! 🙂

Our bodies are smart.  And if you get distinctly uneasy or your body starts to rev up right at those times when you are trying to be calm or relaxed (e.g. during a “relaxing” part of yoga class when everyone else seems to become happy and at ease, or when you are trying to fall asleep…) – it is likely that something in your nervous system suspects that this is NOT SAFE, and thus NOT A GOOD IDEA.  And so, your body does something about that, eh.

Your MIND may think “of course this is safe and fine!!”  But your body may be experiencing something quite different… And, your body believes what it experiences, not what your mind thinks.  Eh.

In this video, I talk about this a bit, and I offer a different way to approach calming your body.

It involves moving through another place first – a place of what I call “calm readiness”.  This is a place where you can check what the current situation actually is, and then choose what action to take.  That choice could be to rest, or it could be to “do something”.

Once you have a choice, your body often feels safer.  And, it is an active agent in helping decide whether it is both SAFE, and REASONABLE, to actually come into rest.

And as I have talked about in other videos too, your nervous system is VERY interested in whether a situation 1) feels safe, 2) feels reasonable for your body, and 3) is useful.

So, what I talk about here gives you that choice, and that “place in the middle” where you can take a moment to ask and notice whether it does, at this moment, feel safe, reasonable, and perhaps even useful to relax.

This may help you to find more ease when the time comes to “relax”, “calm”, or “rest”.  🙂

Happy exploring!

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p.s. here is a link to the the other video I reference in this video, where I talk about settling and being in the present moment.


About the Author:

Violet van Hees is a movement freedom specialist who works with people (and with horses) to release tightness and pain, and to transform body "stuckness" into something that you can work with. We then use what emerges to create new freedom and ease in your movement and in what you do, in ways that feel safe and reasonable - and that work - for you. Violet is a Feldenkrais® Practitioner, a Tellington TTouch® Equine Practitioner, and a BCRPA Trainer of Fitness Leaders. She works with a deep interest in and understanding of biomechanics, neuroplasticity, body response to trauma, energy work, and how we learn.